grow

There are people in our lives we never want to walk away from. But people tend to be meteoric, they come and they go. Sometimes it’s a once in a lifetime kind of thing. Sometimes they’ll come back. And I know the drill, by best friend disappeared from sight and touch for years and one day we just found each other again – different, but still growing in the same direction.

It’s hard to let go. But your heart will tell you when it’s the time – when all is said and done and enough is enough. And then you’re left with the aftermath, whatever it might be.

I’m recovering from a moment as such. And to be honest, I was confused about my feelings. I felt something was missing, but at the same time, I felt full. And now, when all is starting to settle and I’m looking at how I shaped myself recently, I feel nothing but gratitude. And a bit of guilt, over not being sadder. I mean c’mon, that’s the respectful feeling to have.

But something in me doesn’t really let me go there. And there’s a clash between my subconscious, who decided to be a giddy teen again, and my conscious mind which is telling me how it is appropriate to act and feel.

Screw that, scratch that. I’m putting myself in a box for nothing. Life is just a string of wins and lessons, and I am lucky enough to have gotten the best lesson of my life – I have enough, I do enough, I am enough. It’s encrypted on my ribs and my brain just drinks from the thought. It was a lesson worth learning and an experience worth living.

Cheers to that, and to many more shots of clarity that life will throw my way.

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